Poorly written news release blows opportunity to educate on local-global issue

I got excited when I read the headline of a news release from the Environmental Law Alliance Worldwide: Summer Fellows from Honduras and Germany

I went to the news release to learn more about how ELAW brought a couple of people from Honduras and Germany to maybe pick up a few pointers on how the USA does environmental law/cleanup and what things the Americans could learn from them.

Unfortunately, if any of my students in public relations writing turned in this news release, it would have been sent back with all sorts of comments that centered on how the writer missed the point.

Paragraph 1

ELAW Fellows from Honduras and Germany are busy this summer learning about waste management in Lane County and environmental tribunals around the world.

Good start. Here are the people and this is what they are going to do. Got the Who, What, When and Where all in the first sentence.

At this point I expect to then learn their names and a little bit more about why they want to know more about waste management.

Paragraphs 2

Paul Zepeda Castro is an attorney with the Instituto de Derecho Ambiental de Honduras (IDAMHO), based in Tegucigalpa where thousands of people have taken to the streets to protest the alleged embezzlement of social security funds. “We are a warm and peaceful people,” says Paul who is part of a group of young Hondurans calling themselves “Los Indignados” (the outraged). The group is urging the U.S. to suspend funding to Honduras until the government purges corruption.

Our introduction to the guy from Honduras. Okay, he is a lawyer for the Institute for Environmental Rights in Honduras. And we know that there are demonstrations against corruption and that the U.S. should stop funding Honduras until the corruption ends.

So, why is the guy in the U.S. studying waste management? We don’t know.

We do know a bit about the politics of the the guy. And who can complain about demonstrating against corruption? But he is in the States to study waste management practices. How about telling us what Honduran waste management practices are? How about telling us what the guy hopes to learn from his time in the States?

So, we go on to the German.

Paragraph 3

Paul was recently joined by ELAW Fellow Sebastian Bechtel, a legal intern at UfU (Independent Institute for Environmental Concerns). UfU co-hosted the 2014 ELAW Annual International Meeting.

While in Eugene, Sebastian is exploring the feasibility of opening a Europe-based ELAW service center and also conducting research on environmental courts and tribunals.

Okay, we know a little bit more, but what the last paragraph says about what the German is doing in the States does not match up with what the opening paragraph said. Is he here to explore “the feasibility of opening a Europe-based ELAW service center and also conducting research on environmental courts and tribunals.”? Or is he here to study waste management practices?

And then we get the boilerplate about the group.

Wearing both my editor and professor caps at the same time, the writer of this news release threw away a wonderful opportunity to engage news organizations not only on the issue of the environment but also on how dealing with the issue of waste and pollution is something that requires global cooperation.

I would have had both participants discuss the wast management situation in their countries and describe what they hope to get from their visit to the States.

I would have kept the anti-corruption demonstrations out of the release (unless there is a compelling reason to do so). The politics in Honduras is not the focus of the release. The focus is the two guys coming to the States to study waste management.

All the background for the German is not needed until after he explains what is going on in Germany and how he hopes to learn about the American options to waste management.

Bottom line, this was an excellent opportunity to show the international nature of the work ELAW is doing. It would also help educate editors and reporters about the local-global nature of their work and of the issue. And this news release did not do that.

Getting local news organizations to do stories that show local-global connections is hard enough. Organizations, such as ELAW and so many others, need to smarten up their writing so that editors and reporters are drawn into the story and want to expand on it and publish it.

Local-global reporting is vital in an ever connected world. And yet most of local newspapers and broadcasters have little, if anything, about how international events affect their local readers/viewers/listeners. At the same time, these same news organizations are often ignorant of events and organizations in their own communities with international connections that have (or can have) an impact locally or globally.

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Filed under Connections, International News Coverage

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